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Every once in awhile you come up with an idea that's so simple, so ridiculous that it just might work. This one might put me on the list for a Nobel prize, who knows?
Childhood obesity is still a major problem, and up until right now there hasn't been a solution. Since all those other brainiacs were busy coming up with the idea of Windows 7 I've put my efforts somewhere else.
The idea came to me this morning while packing my son's lunch. I was trying to open a package of crackers. Not wanting to give up and grab scissors I finally overcame the super-glued kevlar vault sealing the crunchy wafers. As I wiped the sweat from my brow I thought, "what if all foods that could even remotely contribute to childhood obesity were packaged to withstand a nuclear blast like these crackers?".
Think about this. Prescription and over the counter medications have child-proof, and sometimes senior proof bottles. Who hasn't gotten a headache trying to open a bottle of pain reliever? Household chemicals have childproof packaging. These are items that can be fatal if consumed in high enough quantities. Why not apply the same level of security to the high-sugar, extra-salty trans fatty treats that are robbing the youths of their health?
Imagine fast food packaged in the same manner as Mattel or Hasbro toys. Any parent knows you need scissors, or better yet gardening shears, a pair of pliers, 2 screwdrivers and a box of band-aids to hack through the cardboard, tape, plastic, & wire only to get to the toy and realize you forgot to buy batteries!
Just picture the faces when those kids pull up to the drive through window and get their happy meals only to find out they can't open it. Not so happy, huh? Soda cans requiring a crowbar. Soda bottles with push-down-as-you-squeeze-the-sides-and-recite-the-alphabet-backwards caps. Cookies, chips, and snack cakes in combination locked, recyclable packages that require the correct completion of complicated mathematical formulas to unlock the code. And then the strength of 4 full grown silver-backs to tear through the inner bag.
Maybe out of frustration the kids and their parents who don't pay any mind to their diets will abandon the fatty snacks and resort to something easier to unpack like a banana or an orange. Those that will insist on eating junk food will realize that in order to open the packages they'll have to start exercising to increase their strength levels. Is someone from the FDA, EPA, CPS, CDC, ABCDEFG, or any other agency involved with combating childhood obesity reading this?
Whew! All this brainstorming has given me a headache. I think I need a Tylenol. I better go get my vise-grips!
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